My decision to not eat pork and become sober is getting me in trouble
I don't eat pork and I'm sober. Who cares? Apparently pork eaters do
Vegetarians are still cool but Vegans are still annoying. I have a friend who’s vegan and works for PETA, but only talks about the movies. His opinions are not valid because they’re full blown white as hell. We love vegetarians. Vegetarians can take a joke, make a joke, and joke about themselves.
The same co-worker who is leaving me next week is vegetarian and is hilarious. Makes me laugh. That is the reason why I started working in service again. I need the laughs. My mental has been so cooped up in my head of working at home that I needed someone like him to just banter with. No locker room talk, since that has got me in trouble with liberals but when am I not in trouble? This same co-worker laughs at my jokes, I laugh at his, and now I am convinced to visit Kentucky where he’s from. It sounds like I’m in love with him but I just miss bro-ing out without consequences. Now I’m getting in trouble in different ways. For not eating pork and going sober.
For someone who’s had a past.
Who I used to be were not proud moments but they were fun times. Being in my early to mid 30s I see the changing of the guard but seeing my friends in their late 30s apparently the fun doesn’t stop. The infographic below shows how I moved in my early twenties. Working non-stop which everyone thought increased productivity. I never slept. How I managed stress was working 3 jobs and every single day. I exercised constantly to fight my demons but it didn’t help because I was often injured. The worse one was that I ate so bad and off other peoples plates just to get by.
Now things have changed. All because of a semi-White Lotus moment of getting obliterated but in NYC. No spoilers here but that was hilarious and not even getting that destroyed would have me doing that. Gross even saying that.
Now onto the pork side of things.
I grew up Muslim. Do I practice? No but I am agnostic. I started back on religion when I get sick or fly on planes. Just in case. I know “muslims” who don’t eat pork but are raging alcoholics and pop mollies on Fridays.
I’m not into pork. I’ve had it, not into it. My brother eats pork out of spite. My sister is a secret converted Christian so she eats pork on the daily. Do I care? I don’t.
For a moment I thought I was getting a little bit conservative. Started caring about what young people saw on the subway and would want to shield their eyes from the burners popping drugs on the subways but I thought, why? When I work with my 24 year old white queer non-binary co-worker, they think what comes out of my mouth is conservative because I care (and a man). I forgot what it was like to be 24 and completely not care. So if I’m thinking why should I care, if I have to work with this person and see Hell on the subway then you do too. Builds character, strong bones, better instincts I guess.
I do care. I care about a better society. A better life, to treat all people with respect. I remember being young, liberated, wild and free but now the tables have turned. The personal side of sticking to my guns is not eating pork and being sober. All my other shit morals that I’m leaving behind is slowly fading out or maybe I’m telling myself that.
Look pork is good. I’ve tasted it. I’ve accidentally had it on everything. Prosciutto, bacon, pork on every major holiday. It doesn’t matter to me. Don’t hold it against me. In another life I would probably eat pork happily but because I grew up in the religion of Islam and went to religion school on Sundays called Sunday School, I was taught the following:
Pigs are filthy.
Along with that I can’t have gelatin and marshmallows. Do I follow any of that? No, not really. I eat it once in a blue moon. Gummy bears are great with popcorn and the movies. Marshmallows for camping. Just in case y’all forgot the basics.
With the two, not eating pork and going sober I have now been bullied back to when people were saying retard, calling people gay, and pulling back the eyes because I’m asian. Did I have to bring it to this extreme? Sorry but I do.
It’s bringing back those feelings of being excluded and being force to do something that I don’t want to do. Mind you these are supposedly friends of mine but I thought they wouldn’t care. They care. So much. I get excluded from pork related events when there are other foods. Now I know how vegetarians feel (sorry vegans y’all are still annoying) but vegetarians are fun people. I don’t get invited to bars or clubs because people know I don’t partake. I am still part of the fun, drink a ton of Saratoga water at the club, pinkies up. Next up will be on the fitness influencer’s morning routine…
I don’t eat pork because that’s the one thing I’ve kept with me along during Sunday School. Maybe it’s because it’s what’s left of me practicing in the religion of Islam. I was most definitely not a saint in Sunday School. I skipped more school than I can remember. I smoked weed at Sunday School. I learned that I loved football at Sunday School. I fell in love with someone at Sunday School but loving pork. Sorry, doesn’t apply. Let alone do not care so why should you?
“How long have I been in AA?”
Even for quitting drinking and drugs, people ask me “How long have I been in AA?” I’ve never gone to AA. I know people who have/are and I'm glad it’s helping them.
I remember when I was addicted to cigarettes. I was able to quit fairly easy because I felt the effects of me relying on cigarettes to get by. The adrenaline, the way it relieves stress. I was able to quit because I didn’t want bad breath, yellow teeth, and all the bad shit that comes with cigs.
I remember when I smoked weed in my teenage years till I was 22 and was easily able to quit because the weed was getting so strong that I developed psychosis. Wasting the day, even months away getting absolutely nothing done. I also blamed smoking weed in my teenage years for distorting my memory but studies are coming out saying it doesn’t? Well I feel a lot better now.
I hate to bring politics into this but do you think it’s because it’s this back2back crazy administration we have? That has caused everyone to act up? Politics aside or is because of the new pressures we have in society of the rise of everything going up price wise?
I get it. This life is hard. Can’t do anything without people having something to say.
Let’s not not porkshame or give people shit for going sober. Its easy to do simple math to cut people who don’t partake out of the bill when they don’t order the most expensive pork dish and a fine bottle of sauvignon blanc. When I get to a balling point in my career I’ll split the bill equal ways or better yet cover it. For now, people say I’m saving money not participating but I am. I still ball out on Uber Black, get pastries with my coffee, and eat out every week.